Uh-OH! HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM!

Mom comin' after that one toenail she didn't get last time...but I wants to finish my dinner...but she got the clippers
and that fake "I love you, Beautiful!" smile she putZ on every time she gonna do sumpin' bad, sumpin' REAL bad, but
I wants my romaine, this heart the best part, OH, DUH! thatZ why she gave me the heart of the romaine and she got that
fake smile and dem clipperZ...all for one long toenail she gonna sell her soul to da devil! Gonna tell everyone about this...gonna!

"Oh, Caaaalvin!  Howya doin' OH, my Beautiful widdle boy?"
(NOTE TO CALVIN'S SELF: don't fall for it, don't fall for it, don't fall for it, just eat the romaine
and act like she not there...yeah, do dat, it'll work. Nevah worked yet but this time ----)

"Gotcha!"

(didn't work.)