PSSssssT! Hey, Calvin, Hear the News?

YumYum and Calvin the small, good buddies, share the secret that Coconut and MacNutPie have decided not to have a Pirate-themed wedding after all.  Normally, they would chase one another around and around with joy together, our senior and newest herd members, but YumYum has a reputation for showing the "new kids on the block" who the Alpha Male is when mom's back is turned; so until he mellows out and experiences a RAPTURE,  Calvin and Yummy still have to share gossip and hay between their little hamster fence...turning out they's the most gossipy pigs we ever met, though, who knew?!

Well, when the world wakes up to the news, everybody gonna know!

Sincerely Yours,
Raj and Taj Mahal tattlin-- NO! telling you a story, sharing.
(Note to Self: yeah! sharing! good one...sharing.)

EVERY NIGHT...

Every night Calvin the small gets all bundled up in his special warm, fuzzy fleece blanket for bedtime stories and
snacks with mom. They lay in bed, Calvin in his blanket, mom under the covers, until mom is almost asleep, and
Calvin already IS asleep with mom's hand usually under him or holding his bum or snuggled beneath his long,
tubular snout...he fusses because mom wakes him up when returning him to his cage but soon settles back down
into his cuddlecup while mom returns to hide under the covers with the memory of his warmth soothing her to sleep.

While Their Owners Sleep...

...nervous little Guinea Pigs prepare for their day. Nice job with the white-out, Jerry!
And that looks exactly like our kitchen: How DID you know? LOL!

P.S. if you ever visit The Great Pacific Northwest(ern Washington State) nevah,
EVAH call it an EXpresso machine! Or an EGGspresso machine, you birders out there.
To our utter mortification, a person visiting from Eugene Oregon did that and thus,
to this day, we have NEVAH, EVAH visited Oregon.  Nor will we.

Thank you.
P.S. also we don't use umbrellas, which we call "bumbershoots" dunno why, really.
Oh, but you CAN wear un-matched wool socks with sandals in the winter.
Dunno why, really, dreadful on men. They betta already be married cuz only
a banana slug would date THAT. And mo-

{EDITOR: "DON'T. YOU. DARE!"}

Meant, and Maggie our fave-oh-fave Airdale Terrier.
Not ALWAYS ABOUT YOU, MOM, HOW MANY TIMES WE GOTTA SAY IT?

(whew, close call, that!)

UH-OH, GLAD WE ISN'T WEDDING PLANNER...!

DEar MerryFanny,

{EDITOR: "COCONUT?!"}

Dear MerryF-

{EDITOR: "COCONUT!"}

DEER MARXIST M---

{EDITOR: "COCONUT?!"}

Hey You WeedNplanR,  Whaddya mean @#$^%*^?

{EDITOR: "Coconut, sweetie, look at this beautiful, fresh yellow bell pepper!"}

SQUEEEEEEE! nom-nom-nom...nom-nom-nom...ommmmmm.

note to mariFUN: we doesn't have tails, sometimes it gives us
a wee, widdle attitude...what can we say? Thank you for the dignified,
genteel chupa wedding you planned for them. Please do not feel
discouraged! We LOVE YOU.

Since I WAS NICE,
P.S. please send all carrot-top accoutrements Fed-X for us to ea-
NO! what i meant was "in case they change their mind!" yeah, right, THAT.
in cASe they change their mind.

sincerely YOUR biggest FAN,
YumYum

Pirate Career Counseling

You will have to enlarge the image of the Pirate designated as Captain Marry-Us because if he chooses another career we are back to Square One, Take 3: Just keep LIVING TOGETHER ALREADY:   AARRRGH!

YouTube - Etta James - At Last

YouTube - Etta James - At Last

While mom at the art gallery sittin' in her little chair at her little table

this EPIC iconic jazz standard came on and mom just grooved on it

until the owner looked at the cards in astonishment, asking mom:

"Is that your signature?"

"Yes, is that Etta James?"

And it was Good.

Enjoy the incomparable Etta James.

Weddin Planner's Work to Go in Vain?

Dear ungrateful, Precious Little Darlings,

Our friend, MariFUN, has been working very, very hard on creating special carrot-top wedding items
exclusively for YOU, MacNutPie, and YOU, pretty little CocoNUT, and now you want to throw away
all decorum and stage a PirateKidnapping Wedding full of "Arrrgh's" and body odor, and parrots
screeching: "Grab Thy Wench, Matey, Grab Her and MARRY HER! SQUEEE!" and I just hope you will consider our Wedding Planner's feelings before you make her walk the gangplank if she catches the bouquet. If she not already thrown overboard wid the rest of us so you can hog the buffet
(no pig-hog puns intended.)

Sincerely,
(not really)
mom

MARIFUN - We Have a Mutiny!

Thank you, Jerry, our bestest friend! Thank you for rendering asunder the best laid (no pun intended) wedding plans for our guinea pig nuptials...yes, best friend in Atlanta, now the guinea pigs (thanks to that picture you sent them yesterday!) have chosen "Pirates!" as their wedding theme after all the hard work our wedding planner, MariFUN, has already put into weaving carrot-top procrastinators for the bride and top hats for the groom...

And Thank You, Raj and Taj Mahal, for gettin' in the mix by complimenting beautiful, portly Coconut this morning by telling her that she more beautiful than Keira Knightley and once MariFun makes her some carrot-top pirate hair extensions, she'll be the talk o' the town in Bellingham, the City of Subdued Excitment, or not so subdued excitement.

And Thank You,  Calvin, for suggesting that they have a Pirate Kidnap theme whereupon MacNutPie growls: "Aaaargh, ya wench, you be MINE NOW!" before taking off her carrot top procrastinator, eating it, then taking her back to his "ship" (i.e. PIGLOO which will need a new pirate paint-job and some anchors and a treasure chest full of golden alfalfa hay pellets!)

Thank you ALL for making our wedding planners VOLUNTEER efforts that much easier...

Sincerely,
YumYum

P.S. and this time NOT MY FAULT! Just some o' it: mu-ah-Ha-HAAAAAAA!

Wedding Planner, We Have a Problem!

Dear Wedding Planner, MariFUN,

It's not like I'm a snitch or anything - far from it, Aaarh! - but MacNutPie went behind your back for his wedding tuxedo! Now what Coco gonna wear? Chanel #5?

You didn't here it from me!

Sincerely Your,
YumYum

Mom DROPS THINGS

We hope that mom doesn't really work here because nothing good can come from it...except...droppage.
Every morning we suck her hot coffee up off the floor through the carpet, it's like THAT, y'all...seriously.

We Inspire Ourselves

What mom looks at to keep working when S.E.A.L. Team Six is blasting her eyes out from inside her head.
Why? Because we're beautiful!

The Little Table That Could, and Did

This is where the table was...and mom so happy!