The Sleep of Innocence

Mom and Raj are both asleep. Only Raj has his own double-cuddle-cup-tunnel while mom has...less. But at least she sleeps with her eyes closed!
He wore himself out. Taj has launched an exhaustive INVESTIGATIVE REPORT into  "HOW GOOD PIGS GO BAD!"

Taj's Tragic Tale

This is the story of how I was banished by my very own brother from my very own Holiday Hut and how much he takes after YumYum, the delusional Pirate of Love and Ill Repute! I will accept organic romaine lettuce embellished with bright red, yellow, and orange bell peppers stuffed with carrot tops and pomegranate seeds. As compensation for my suffering.

Thank you very much...

One day there was a Magic Slipper worn by a beautiful princess...(O.K. it belonged to mom, but I ain't got that much to work with here...) Besides she reads these posts and there really is one fine-looking pomegranate just waiting -
But, I digress.

Super Slipper Supper!

Hmmm, this has possibilities...especially since it is attached and I wouldn't have to toss it...hmmm.

Raj, up to no good again? Whaddya doing with mom's slipper?
RAJ, SHE STILL IN IT! YOU ARE BEING SILLY.

Taj, it's a "toss up" (hee-hee: "toss-up!) between the mini-hay-bale and the slipper...whaddya think?

Hmmm...now that does look like some EPIC CHEWY FUN!

Then we are AGREED! SLIPPER IT SHALL BE! Mom won't even notice...

Taj, you should have joined me! My first Slipper-Supper and I had to eat all alone...you were worried about mom, weren't you? Just for that, you coward, I will take my place in the Holiday Hut seein' how you have already warmed it up for me and I know you won't mind.
And you know I won't mind even if you do mind.



Ahhhh...now all I need is a spot of chamomile tea, one carrot crumpet, and a cucumber sandwich without the bread!
Life is good when you are Raj Mahal!

MMmm...

MMMmmm, nom-nom-nom!

HayToss ABSTRACTED

Have you any idea how hard it is having an artist for a mom?
See, I think this shows my good side.

But she reading all about Expressionism as being the
first real, Western style of painting that used animals to illustrate and illuminate Spirituality in nature. She loves Franz Marc's paintings of cows and horses. So, during the Hay Toss, she found this image closer to Spiritual Expressionism than my formal portraits. Personally...
I feel objectified.
So many fancy words and so little meaning...
now I understand why some of mom's "companions" did NOT enjoy gallery galas!
They speak GobbleDeeGoop!
With all due respect to artists, of course.
~)not really(~
See how easy it is to be weird and call it a fancy name?
What would you call my new performance piece:
~)not really(~
?
PLEASE VALIDATE ME BY PARTICIPATING IN THE POLL (UP TOP ON THE RIGHT.)
THANK YOU!

AAARRRRGGGGH!

WHILE it is true that YumYum bears a striking resemblence to Johnny Depp in this photograph, be not deceived: It is one of the illusions pulled straight from the dubloon-bag of YumYum's arsenal of wooing! Mom is contacting "a person of note" to have YumYum's hat re-sized, because the sparkle in his eye can be seen (when not hidden by hat) Across the Pond straight into FairyLand!

During an exclusive interview last year, Johnny Depp revealed for the first time, that if he was a guinea pig, he would be YumYum! Personally, we still love him from "Benny and Joon" and would walk 10,000 miles to see it again!

Thank goodness for NETFLIX!

Millicent Beatrice

Millie Bea, so your mom has been out shopping for you, buying you even more snuggly cuddle cups and tunnels and flowers and now we see you are wearing a CROWN with DOVES? Could you be in love?

Either way, what a lovely life you have now with your mom who rescued you and has completely spoiled you
(WAY TO GO, MILLIE BEA, YOU GOT HER RIGHT WHERE WE WANTS 'EM, EH?)
and we just wanted to pop by for a spot of tea but mom says we gonna have a storm so she taking her 4-wheeled walker to get us plenty of good salad treats and piggie-spoiling items sure to please, even if we are all stuck inside.

When are we NOT stuck inside?

Have we ever been OUTSIDE?

That the beauty of brain-damage! Mom ain't got NO idea what she doing, thinks we roam free through
sumptuous hay-flower gardens surrounding her majestic summer villa in Italy, so she endeavors ceaselessy to make up for our "winter incarceration" overcompensating us with GuineaSpoiling!
We are so NOT taking advantage of her disAbilities, we are mere exploiting them and can't wait to see what she brings home! It's a fine art we have refined, the exploitation of Mom's Confoozion.

Milicent Beatrice...you look quite fetching -

"YUM-YUM, GIVE IT A REST!" shouts the herd, rolling their eyes, tossing hay bales into the sky!

The herd is merely jealous...ta-ta and please keep this between us as my little Fairy mustn't see this.
Nor you see her. Or -

"YUM-YUM, YOU SHAMELESS DON JUAN DE MARCO, GIVE IT A REST!"



Only 50 Miles East o'Here...EDEN!

WHO KNOWS WHERE WE HID MOM'S SNOWSHOES LAST YEAR?

No, we did not nibble them.


Or taste, chew, slice, dice, explore, pee, poo, or in any way - 


WHO KNOWS WHERE WE HID MOM'S SNOWSHOES LAST YEAR?

WINTER BECKONS: MOM, COME OUT AND PLAY!

Remember when we used to live at the Audubon Wildlife Refuge? We do, too...and our view was a little like this. Now our view is different. We see Adagio Cafe's sign turning, turning, turning...which is not so bad...

Still. Mom remembers how loverly it felt when snow blanketed hilltops and EVERY PLACE, even the San Juan Islands,  promising stillness of all city sound:only the honking of Canada geese, the cry of the bald eagles bringing branches over the pond to bolster their nest, and - one special year -when wild swans flew in during a two-week snowstorm and mom would ski to them, listening in on their pre-dawn and dusk gab-fests...for although geese honk, swans are different. They conversate and gather together to gossip about the swans on the other side of the lake, and each offers his or her opinions on how well the eagles are keeping up their nest, the color of the sky, the crispness of the air, and whether or not they really will fly farther south once the two-week blizzard has blown through. Swans actually talk in a language mom found captivating. And she was able to ski real close to them...almost into them! But we're pretty sure we've already told THAT story...

Do we still miss our old home?

Every day.

Are we grateful for where we live now? Bathed in light, only a block from the best lattes in town? Within walker-distance of everything from the Post Office to the Art Gallery? A cheery smile from every merchant? Knowing that Avellino's vegan, gluten-free baker will save mom's faves until she gets there on weekends?

Every day.

Does mom need to get out of bed and savor life by embracing the impending snowstorm by finding flashlights, radios, batteries, cold-weather boots, and the accouterments that accompany power outages?

Every day. Although right now would be good, too.She only has one more sick day left before the storm...think she better get on with it!

YUM-YUM CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Before you read YumYum's pathetic attempt to impress his new-found soul-mate from Across the Pond, let me, CocoNutPie, FOR THE RECORD, demonstrate the "HAY TOSS" that stunned the world! WHY?

YumYum pretended mom lost this photograph.
Pathetic. No wonder he's been a bachelor so long! Well, remember the "Thrilla in Manila?" (Yes, we were saddened by the recent passing of Smokin' Joe Frazier...though Ali showing up for his funeral demonstrated a depth of compassion often hidden behind the raw, brutality of boxing...but, I digress.) No, I don't! This here girl about to demonstrate RIGHTEOUS mini-hay-bale tossing!
YES!
THIS IS REALLY ME IN OUR NEW GuineaElfVillage Coliseum SHAKE-N-IT!
What you are about to read...just propaganda from a love-sick boy whose heart cannot bear separation from his precious Fairy...perhaps even I can show some compassion for that...just pretend you didn't see the truth, declare him the winner, and let him be macho. Something tells me his darling Fairy is

way too refined to be impressed. I already consider her as close to me as my sister-in-law...awwww. Fairy, I can be sweet and lovable, when not competing.

Love You, Fairy, so just pretend YumYum won...and love him just the way he is.

Truth is, we all love YOU!

THE GREAT "HAY TOSS" OF 2011!

Hey, Mac, mom's sick today so we can kinda do whatever we want! How's about I spring you and Coconut from your cage to play with me in our new GuineaElfVillage? She's sleeping? FINE!

"COCONUT PIE, I CHALLENGE YOU TO A HAY TOSSING CONTEST TO BE HELD IN OUR NEW WINTER-SNOW HUT, WE CAN USE IT AS OUR OLYMPIC ARENA! WHAT SAY THEE? OH, WHO CARES! JUST TO IMPRESS MY PRECIOUS FAIRY, I SHALL GO AHEAD AND TOSS THE MINI-HAY BALE AS IF WE WERE PLAYING SCOTTISH GAMES!

ERRRRrrrrr....MMMMMmmmmRRRRRrrrr......

                                "UMPH!"

Quite impressive, even if I say so myself...
wonder what my Fairy thinks???

MOM! I can't watch! Flying HAY? What's next? Birds with wings?

EXCUSE YOU, YUM-YUM, BUT DID YOU JUST CHALLENGE ME?

Because, if you think that just because I'm a girl, you can win...

Check out my Righteous DEW LAP! HA!

Calvin: "how come when mom sees her own dew lap in the mirror we hear - "

All in Unison: "CALVIN! Shhhhhhhh! Don't wake her up!"
(That was close!)

"Oh my, then, I'll just hide and be quiet...I can't watch and - besides - mom fell asleep with her hand under my dew lap..."

Calvin the Small, I feel your pain. But I have to look and cheer on CoconutPie for she will be returning to our Cozy Happy Home in good spirits if she wins. And you have NO idea what it's like around here when she gets hormonal and -

Herd in UNISON: "SSSSSHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhh!
Has living with mom taught you nothing?"

Since I won, Dear Fairy, may I be your Great American Hero?

Who said you won, YumYum? I'm just getting stretched out!

Maybe Calvin's right, and I shouldn't look, either...this could get -?

MMMMMMMMMMMRUMPHhhhhhhhhh!

I LOOKED, I LOOKED! NOW MY FACE IS STUCK!
BUT WE HAVE A WINNER...
BUT MY FACE IS STUCK.

Actually, that photograph resembled YumYum tossing hay more than Coconut pie. Why? Because mom wasn't well enough to hold the camera steady for the competition, then she couldn't find another photo of Coconut tossing her mini hay bale,
so - in the end - it was mom who cheated!

With her dew lap rocking to-and-fro.

You did not see that,
We were never here,
We deny any knowledge of dew-lappage
and will continue to deny any and all allegations of
speaking to the Press of mom's dew-lappages.
Unless we have a dew-lap-in-Judgement.
In which case we...SQUEEEEEEEEEEE!

thank you.

Our Prayer

Before mom signs off for possible sick leave, we wish to leave you all a gift from our spiritual teacher, Sant Rajinder Singh. When mom goes "horizontal" on us, she either has one of us in Calvin's blanket in bed with her (usually Calvin, talking and eating in his sleep) or she is meditating quietly...
Right now Calvin is in his special bed talking in his sleep and mom is counting the  many  blessings that keep us feeling loved, safe, and warm...including our new friends! Yet, concerned for the less fortunate amongst us - those abandoned, unwanted, orphaned brothers and sisters still waiting to find their Forever Homes with unconditional love armed only with HOPE in our humanity!

Love,
All of Us and that includes Fairy and Millie Bea and even the big whales in the sea...